In Loving Memory

This morning mother's battle with cancer came to an end as she passed quickly and painlessly on to dance with her Father in heaven. As I waited for the hospice nurse to come and make the pronouncement I put on praise music and danced and sang her all the way on up in a celebration of heart I know she would have appreciated and been blessed by; then I noticed this little bird suddenly come and sit up on her porch watching and singing, a sign that she is now free as a bird with no cares of this world but still silently here to watch and guide us lovingly, all the while singing His praises. I pray her legacy for impacting children will live on in me and I know she has sown into her grandchildren's lives in ways I cannot even put into words. They will always remember her love and encouragement especially when they need it most, as will I.

God bless her precious soul
may she rest in peace
Judith Ann Pesto Quatrine
September 7, 1942 - February 27, 2010

For the Love of

... Benjamin who turned ten this past Saturday we took some friends and family to Rollhaven in Grand Blanc for loads of birthday fun. We headed out in the big red Rosie van to collect three school friends and a buddy from church then met up with some cousins, uncles, aunt and grandparents at the venue where we enjoyed pizza, pop, arcade games, ice cream cones, birthday cake, and Ben got to have a go in the Money Machine since he was the guest of honor.

Then we got down to business with a couple games of some serious Laser Tag. Players ranged in age from 9 to 60 something and included Ben, Fox, Ethan, Alex, Michael, Kyle, Bruno, Jeremy, Taylor, Riley, Mom and Dad, Uncle James, Grandpa Q, Aunt Dorothy, and R.J. The competition was fierce and we all had a blast!

... my 1st grade buddy Scott. Last Wednesday I subbed the afternoon in my favorite first grade class, my friend with compulsion issues was there and we had a great time during Center/Free Time Activities. Scott has impluses he can't control, he'll eat things, go up and randomly smack a kid on the back or super squeeze someone, or he'll just start pulling things out of drawers in the classroom. He's on medication and is getting better about keeping in control but he really needs someone to stay near and keep him focused. He is incredibly smart and has a servant's heart; it is very touching to see how his classmates try to protect him, especially the girls with their 'mothering' instincts. I honestly like the kid and my heart goes out for him. Peace to you little brother man.




.... teenagers. I think this picture says it all, if you want to keep peace in the car on a long ride all you need are ....

There are many fine things which you mean to do some day, under what you think will be more favorable circumstances. But the only time that is surely yours is the present, hence this is the time to speak the word of appreciation and sympathy, to do the generous deed, to forgive the fault of a thoughtless friend [or family member], to sacrifice self a little more for others. Today is the day in which to express your noblest qualites of mind and heart, to do at least one worthy thing which you have long postponed, and to use your God-given abilities for the enrichment of some less fortunate fellow traveler. Today you can make your life ... significant and worthwhile. The present is yours to do with it as you will. ~Grenville Kleiser

Love from Ethan

Ethan brought the cutest poem home from school I just had to post it!
They were writing out poems in cursive.

I bought a box of chocolate hearts,

a present for my mother.

They looked so good I tasted one

and then I had another.

I couldn't seem to stop myself,

I nibbled on and on.

Before I knew what happened

all the chocolates were gone.

I felt a little guilty,

I was stuffed down to my socks.

I ate my mother's Valentine.....

I hope she likes the box.

===

Love Notes

My sub job for Wednesday was canceled unfortunately due to the snow day but I was fortunate enough to make it to church in the evening and be up for praise and worship again with Pastor Francine leading. While we were doing the offering I gave her a big squeeze as I returned to my seat (we get up and take our offering to the platform) and whispered "Thanks, that was so awesome!" She whispered back "I'm so glad you were here! I was going to call you and ask if you were coming." That was wonderful to hear. "I'll be here as much as I can on Wednesdays," I responded. The worship was wonderful, she went off and sang new words from her heart (we call it singing in the spirit) as the instrumentalists continued to play beyond our regular 'set' and I just kept a melody in vowel tones going to 'float' the groove. I love it when things come about spontaneously like that. We had a great team with Pastor Jeff on drums, Pastor Andrew on guitar, Brandon S. on keys, and the righteous Philbert on guitar.
--
I did get to sub on Thursday in the computer lab. It was pretty mellow since they had Free Choice before the holiday except for a group of 4th graders that came in to work on math. Apparently this is a fairly new system and only the second time they came in to do this. She had a game on fractions picked out but it was waaaayyyy beyond their comprehension since they had barely even been introduced to fractions other than knowing which number was the denominator and which was the numerator let alone which were equal or not equal! So I punted and had everyone go to FunBrain Math Arcade and see how far they could get through the game before our time was up. If they were comfortable with math I said to set the level at 4, if they were really good then challenge themselves with level 5, if they struggled with math then go on level 3. This is a great game that uses different techo games to reinforce math concepts and push speed on basic rout functions. At the end of the day I decided to take initiative and leave the room better than I found it taking time to delouse ALL keyboards, mouses, monitors, and terminals, plus dust the desk tops and shelving to remove an infiltration of dust bunnies. I made Ben and Ethan give me a hand when they got to the room at the end of the school day. I saw the teacher today and she was quite thankful for the effort.
--
Over the week I worked on painting some ceramic heart jewelry boxes for people for Valentine's Day, something I haven't done in a while and found very cathartic. Saturday the boys and I headed down to my mom's to spend the weekend. My brother orchestrated some Valentine's Day fun for his favorite ladies complete with massage, facial, manicures, and pedicures. Wow. While we got pampered the boys had a gameboy fest and played on the computer.
--

Sunday we went to church with mother. The boys haven't had much experience with the Catholic church but they found it to be a tolerable experience, much more subdued than our spirit-filled Word church. We even arrived before the 8:15am mass began so mother could show them around the sanctuary and introduce them to her friends. Since mom sold her Saturn I had my big red Rosie van this time which proved to be extremely challenging since our princess was experiencing major muscle weakness. Thankfully an angel was sent in the form of Jim (a medic no less) who saw us having difficulty loading her back in the van at St. Ambrose. I asked if she'd rather head back home after the rig-a-ma-roll but she was determined to go out to breakfast, so over to the Clairpointe we went. We made it through it all but after she was tucked safely in bed for the night I was prompted to do some research on the newest medication they had prescribed for her. Her first week home from the hospital she was showing signs of improved strength and even had several days of not using her walking stick all the time. The second week they put her on a new 'anti-seizure' medication which was now built up several weeks into her blood stream. Come to find out a side effect of this drug is weakness, sleepiness (she could barely get off the couch last week and kept saying she was so sleepy), and dry stuffy nose which has also been a drag lately. Another angel arrived on Monday in the form of a new hospice nurse Caprice. We had some discussion with her about what was happening, she consulted the hospice doc and a new script was written. This made mother feel a lot better just to have some sort of understanding as to why she 'suddenly' was not able to do what she had a week before. Details were discussed regarding other meds and a new plan of attack was put in place. I love my mom's attitude when weird things start happening, "It was not fun, but now we learned a new thing about what to do. We're always learning as we go." She also had bright idea to have a Wright & Fillipis representative come out and consult about installing grab bars at the bottom and top of the stairs and in the shower. Part of the challenge was when she got to the top of her stairs to go to her bedroom there was no good place for her to get a hold for leverage and her knees would betray her. Monday morning I made it so and the workman was out today. I called when I got home from subbing today and she sounded very up beat and excited about these new developments. The workman (aptly named John) even fixed a couple other things he noticed that could be a hazard. Another angel I dare say.

--

Sunday afternoon after a good nap on the couch some of mom's friends stopped by for a visit and the boys and I shared our Valentine's Day present - more of our choir songs. The boys got a little shy having the extra audience but it was worth it just to see Princess Judi waving a banner of praise along with us.

--

Monday was Ben's birthday celebration with gramma, he had his own vision for a television cake with Pokemon on the screen. We ran out to the grocery store for supplies while the home health aide was getting the princess washed and dressed and later a fabulously inspired cake was created. Rob took Alex down to the shop with him Monday since she didn't have school and she earned a few bucks by cleaning the shop bathrooms and offices. Woot! The dynamic duo to round out our Parton half dozen arrived in the evening for dinner and we all had a great time catching up about our weekend.

My other Valentine's surprise was new Team Judi t-shirts! The boys and I showed up in ours when we arrived Saturday, then Rob and Alex had theirs on when they showed up Monday. Mom loved them. Not only are we standing on the Word, we're wearing the Word! Blessings to all, keep fightin' the good fight!

I Love a Good Word

Just a very quick post this time. A couple weeks ago at a Wednesday night service Pastor Francine Wells delivered an awesome message that will make you think. Please enjoy this audio feed and be blessed.

Hear, Speak, Believe

Totally Lovin'

-- the new sound booth at our church! Instead of having this big square out in the middle of the sanctuary they converted a storage room that connected to the back of the room and it is awesome! Well done men who did so much work so quickly and farewell ark on the wall that will soon be painted over.


-- going to the library! I am a card carrying member of no less than four different libraries in three counties (although now you really don't need separate cards with the MI Card system). We go regularly to the North Branch Public Library, Lapeer Public Library, and Rochester Hills Public Library plus I belong to the Flint Public Library. Since we don't have any activities going on in Flint at the moment I haven't been using that one much but when Alex and the boys were heavily involved in music and theater at the Flint Cultural Center we spent many hours a week perusing the books, enjoying movies and spending time on the computers.

This is a stock photo of the Rochester Hills Public Library in a warmer season.


-- inspired writings by Ben.

Metaphor Me
I am an egg because I am gentle.
I am a Smartie because I am smart.
I am a shrimp because I am short.
I am lightning because I am so fast.
I am a river because I go with the flow.
I am a train because I am so loud sometimes.
I am a Wii because I like to try new things.



And I'll close with a Friday Fill-In
1. Pickles make sandwiches more fun.
2. I sleep the best at home.
3. The snow is lovely but quite unnecessary.
4. Cures for everything can be found in nature.
5. It's 5:16 PM; that means time to figure out what's for dinner.
6. Peace of mind is hard to find (or more so, keep).
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to a good rest after a fabulous dinner of Brazilian Chicken Cutlets with raw tropical sauce & couscous (from Rachael Ray's Big Orange Book - Delish), tomorrow my plans include Valentine's fun hosted by my brother at my mom's house and Sunday, I want to have more Valentine's fun with mom and the boys. We're all going to go to her church and we have some more of our songs to sing for her, (& other surprises planned)!

A Lovely Sunday

On Sunday Mom was feeling on an energy upswing after a low key week of much napping. She surprised me by announcing at 7:55am that she wanted to go to 8:15am Mass. Ok, let's do it, was my reply. We had already eaten a fabulous quiche with clementines on the side for breakfast so all we had to do was get dressed and take care of dog business before we loaded up and headed to St. Ambrose, arriving at 8:40am which in mom's world is right on time. After communion we made our leave. Do you want to make any stops before we go home? I inquired. I'm thinking Starbucks, she piped back. Sounds like a plan to me.





We arrived at the coffee shop and two of her main buddies were already there; within minutes we had a group of nearly 8 regulars gathered around a couple tables with more stopping over to give hugs, blessings, and words of encouragement to mom as she enjoyed a Cheese Danish and Vanilla Rooibos Tea. I savored my Peppermint Mocha and had a nice chat with some people I had and hadn't met before while mom caught up with her peeps. Good Time.



Getting back to the house I got mom hooked up to the oxygen for a 'fill-up' and settled on the couch to rest up before our afternoon outing. Her nap was interupted by a brief visit from my cousins bringing good wishes, a baby to kanoodle, and some fabulous spinach pie. They left, mom napped briefly, and I worked on the computer. Had some lunch then her friend Joanne arrived to pick us up to go to the DIA to see the film 'La Danse' along with two other friends, Dorothy and Cathy.



The documentary by Frederick Wiseman on the reknown Paris Opera Ballet was extremely well-done although very long. We found out as we made our early exit that they were given the wrong cut. Instead of the 152 minutes version, this one ran nearly 3 hours long. Yikes. I love listening to them speak French and the dancers were nothing short of phenomenal in their athleticism and execution. It was also refreshing to watch a dance film that didn't focus on the grueling aspect of dance: the injuries, egos, financial struggles and I was also impressed at the variety in choreographic styles the company chose to use within their season. On the way back to the house in a carful of friends mom commented 'it's so good to be out in the world again.' She's been very good about not pushing herself and making sure to rest and eat right but she can only take so much of being cooped up inside and needs to break out every once in awhile. Soon the weather will be warmer and she can sit out on her porch, read and enjoy the sunshine and fellowship with neighbors and friends that walk by regularly with their dogs. Back at the house I took Jake and Brulee for a quick walk, had some of that wonderful spinach pie with mom then handed the baton to my Aunt Marcia who was on Princess Duty for the night. A very blessed Sunday indeed.

I Love ...

the theater! All forms of theater I find intriguing and entertaining and I am very proud of Alexandra's directorial debut on the production "Cut." It was a very convoluted and involved piece to take on with many cast members playing multiple roles. The kids had a great time with it even though the audiences left fairly confused, but that was part of the point. She didn't write it, just direct and with virtually no help from her loosely titled co-director. In this life you have to learn to deal with difficult people and Alex has had her fair share of experience in this area, which will make her a strong authority as she progresses with her craft.

Mr. S and my superstar!!

... my dog! Ok, technically he's my daughter's dog but I spend a majority of time with him. Jake loves to travel in the van or car and is a great companion to walk with. His only downfall is he is not a watch dog at all being that he never barks at people.


... not being afraid to defend my faith. This hasn't always been the case and I'm still not really a get in your face 'you gotta get Jesus or you're going to hell' kind of person. But I know, what I know and believe what I believe and seen what I've seen regarding the mighty power of God and the saving grace of salvation. With Him all things are possible!

Psalm 91 (New King James Version)

Safety of Abiding in the Presence of God

He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High
Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust.”
--
Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler^"
And from the perilous pestilence.
He shall cover you with His feathers,
And under His wings you shall take refuge;
His truth shall be your shield and buckler.
You shall not be afraid of the terror by night,
Nor of the arrow that flies by day,
Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness,
Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday.
--
A thousand may fall at your side,
And ten thousand at your right hand;
But it shall not come near you.
Only with your eyes shall you look,
And see the reward of the wicked.
--
Because you have made the LORD, who is my refuge,
Even the Most High, your dwelling place,
No evil shall befall you,
Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling;
For He shall give His angels charge over you,
To keep you in all your ways.
In their hands they shall bear you up,
Lest you dash your foot against a stone.
You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra,
The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot.
--
“Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him;
I will set him on high, because he has known My name.
He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him,
And show him My salvation.”

Love Fest 2010

Ok, I know it's sappy and not very original but February is declared the month of Love Fest this year with each post focusing on people, things, events, and concepts that I love and find joy in. First I'll start with the Pastors and Elders of my church. The photo below from the left features Pastor Jeff Wells, Cindy & Harold Green, Josette & Michael Morales, Brenda & John McCumons, and Brad & Kim Johnson (Pastor Francine, Jeff's lovely wife is not in this picture). These people are amazing to me and have brought me much joy and encouragement during happy and sorrowful times in my life. They continue to strive for Christ-like status but are fully aware of their humaness and short comings. My "show the love" campaign that has come about lately stems mainly from their example and teachings throughout the years. Another thing that I love - newborn babies! Carrying them, birthing them, nursing them, singing to them, rocking them, washing them, loving them, and watching them grow. Can you guess which one of my babies this is?
And the last point for this post, I love to praise and worship! No greater joy can come from letting loose and singing praises for all to hear, at church, at home, in the car, in the store, loudly, softly, in the natural or in the spirit, I love to praise! Last night I was up singing with the adult P&W team for the first time in almost two years and it was awesome. Although I've done a lot working with the children on choir music and with the youth P&W team these past couple years it was wonderful to return again to where I started with FCFC, on the platform under the annointing of some amazing P&W leaders. With His grace I hope to be part of it again more regularly in the future. Find the Love - Feel the Joy!

February 2010

All About Blog

The world of blogging is such an interesting animal. I'm always amazed to see where my hits come in from, they are international at times. Many are from friends and family I know, many from extended friends I've never met in person, and some are totally random. It would bless me to "meet" and find out more about who's visiting so please add on as a follower, that way if you have a blog I can check in on you in your neck of the world. It is surprising and reassuring to know that no matter where on this great globe we live, everyone deals with similar issues in life, the trials, tribulations, successes, surprises, burdens and blessings. Don't be shy, join in on the fun. Follow my blog and I'll follow yours!

My week was a blessed and productive one. I finished another batch of writing work, got some domestic duties accomplished, had my own personal praise & worship party, helped Ben get his Book Report mapped out for an ongoing project at school; he did it on "Lost & Found" by Andrew Clement. Ethan and Ben are also beginning to work on their Valentine Mailboxes, progress reports came home for them this week and both have a lion's share of As in all areas. Woot! Fox is continuing to type his novel into the computer and revising as he goes. Social Studies and Science have been most intriguing to him as they learn about Ancient China & India and are beginning the Periodic Table of Elements. This is refreshing to me since these were the two areas I felt I was unable to spend enough time with him on as a homeschooling educator because my time was being pulled in to many directions; it's good to know he is getting more info and opportunity in these subjects.

I've also been checking in on mom daily, she is getting stronger everyday, has stopped using her walking stick so much to get around and has been getting dressed without assistance; may not seem like much but if you know from whence she came this is huge. She also got out and about with my brother yesterday for the first time since coming home from the hospital this last time and friends have been stopping by and calling constantly yet at just the right intervals to give her time to rest as well.

Friday I was happy to be an abundant blessing for my dear friend Jen who is the Office Manager at my church. Since they downsized the office staff I have been volunteering and going in one day a week to help out with time consuming tasks. The past few weeks I was unable to be of help since I needed to be there for mom or sub, but was glad to return and at just the right time. I was successful in getting the newsletter together, making CD duplications for visitor packets, cutting and stuffing the inserts for our weekly bulletin and just being there to vent and have a laugh with her. Good times. In the evening I took the boys to see The Stand Strength Team at New Life Church in Attica, MI. They are based out of Sterling Heights, MI but travel nationwide to minister in schools and churches, using feats of strength to parable the salvation of Christ, plus some of the team members are musicians and they can totally rock. Pastor Shrek is one of the most fantabulous drummers I've witnessed in a while and he can preach! When they're in the schools they promote respect and responsibility but when they're at churches they "get 'em saved." We saw several friends from church there and Ethan found a buddy from school too. Great way to wrap up the week.

Tonight after dinner I'll be heading back down to Grosse Pointe to hang with the moms until Tuesday, looking forward to attending mass with her tomorrow morning and doing whatever she needs done while I'm there.

Alexandra had her driving privileges returned this week but is still on "probation" and making a concentrated effort to up her responsibility level and show respect plus she has a new appreciation for her independence. You don't know what you've got until it's gone, eh? She has also taken on the task of understudying a role for the One-Act that the school is bringing to competition since one of the girls has a prior commitment on one of the competition weekends. This is a daunting task to come in last minute and step into a pivotal part but I'm impressed the drama teacher has such faith in her to rise to the occasion. "Cut," the one-act she's directing, goes up this Thursday, Friday and Saturday at North Branch High School at 7:30pm every night. Come on out and join the fun.

Remember, when you point the finger at someone, there's still three pointing back at you.

Up Your Blog

It is during times of great trouble and tragedy you learn the most about a person's true character. As things have progressed with my mother's health I have come to find out many judgements and misconceptions some of my family have about me and it is truly disconcerting. Never in my life have I had more opportunity to be Christ-like, I am determined to continue to show the love to and for my mother and they can whip me, beat me, and tie me to a tree I will not enter the quagmire of vile they spew or return a verbal punch. My first reaction upon writing this is to defend myself, my life choices, my finances, my marriage, my husband, my kids, my relationship with my mother, but then I think, no. I have nothing to defend. My life may not be perfect but it is filled with love, grace, humility and tons of future potential. I have all that I need through His riches and glory.


Mother is still a constant source of amazement to me and I honestly enjoy being there to care for her. She has set a goal to "get stronger and get better." While others are quick to voice the reality the doctors have set forth I continue to stand in faith with her and rebuke any negative thought or word spoken about her condition. As it is written in Isaiah 53:4-5 Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. Since I know Judi has claimed Jesus as her Savior, this power she has full entitlement to.

Today I was in a first grade class again, this time there were no major development issues to deal with just one boy with behavioral concerns. I'd been in this room before and did fine, today however I had to send behavior man to the office, something I try to avoid at all costs. The morning progressed without incident but after lunch, during Writing Workshop time when the children are supposed to write independently and quietly for 20 minutes, things got a tad bit too unfocused for my taste and I had to repeat myself too many times without results. So, the biggest culprit was removed from the class and the rest were instructed to copy some statements I wrote down and put up on the ELMO. "I will do my best. I will work quietly. I will follow directions. I will do my own work and not bother my neighbor." This was done in almost utter silence. They knew I was pushed as far as I was going to go. From there we progressed quietly, using whispers as people finished the dictated assignment, on to their math page for the day. Upon completion and review of the math I did allow them to have their Choice Time free play, snack, and watch a little "Kipper" I pulled from my Netflix Instant Movies. We finished the day with success and I can guarantee those students know not to mess around with Mrs. Parton. I love to have fun with the kids but we will get the work done, because that's what we're there for! Lately I've been getting much better at addressing the class with an authoritative voice that is not yelling, very effective.

Oh, and I pretty much lined up a job for myself when I'm ready for it.......

Surreal Blog

Wow, it's been quite a few weeks. Mom has been in and out of the hospital several times, emotions have been up and down, I've been praying like I've never prayed before and we had the meeting you never image you'll ever have. The one where a doctor actually gives you a time estimate on how much longer your mother has left to live. Wow. Mother came home tonight and has decided not to undergo any more procedures to combat the cancer; even after the radiation treatments the areas in the brain have grown. She was treated with antibotics for the pnemonia and is on blood thinners for the clot in her lung plus they're going to put her on a low dose steroid again to help get the swelling in the brain down which may have been causing her moments of lost lucidity. Even though the doctors have an estimate based on their worldly reports I know that there is a bigger power at the helm and she has already gotten more time than most people who have been diagnosed with the same type of cancer. Now it's time to ride it on out and enjoy ever precious moment we have left.

--

In addition to spending some days at the hospital I've also gotten a few sub days this week. My first of the new year, it was nice to have somewhere else to put my thoughts and energy. Tuesday I was in a 1st grade class with many medical, mental and behavioral issues but we had a decent day. Today and tomorrow I am in for the band teacher which is always one of my favorite slots to fill. I also had a chance to meet with the principal and offer my services in the Upper Elementary School to host a Choice Time Choir during the last Trimester. She was totally into it, without hesitation so starting in March I'll be rehearsing with hopefully a nice size group of 5th and 6th graders Friday afternoons from 3-3:30pm. It is by giving that we receive so my thought is by sowing in without pay perhaps it will bring more opportunities with financial advancement in the future. Plus, I just love to sing with kids and I need an outlet for my creative juices.

--

Robert has been on the road this week in Illinois and then to Wisconsin with a possible call on the horizon to Florida. There have also been some possible new business opportunites that have been being researched and discussed at the shop and I am hopeful and expectant that prosperity is soon to come from these endeavors.

--

Alexandra is getting into final stages of her directorial debut; tech week, next week, then dress and "Cut" opens Thursday, February 4th. It is a play, inside a play, inside a play, inside a play; complete craziness and bedlam....right up her alley. She is also in the midst of her first official grounding after making some very unwise choices. I'll spare the details but she has lost the use of our vehicles until further notice and is working her way back into our good graces. She's also talked about looking for another job because they keep cutting her hours at Burger King.

--

Fox is holding on to his A and A+ average and was excited to be the only student out of all three of his Science teacher's classes to get 100% on the last test. Plus he finished writing the novel he's been working on and has been given permission by his AR teacher to go down to the computer lab and work on typing it into the computer during SeminAR time since he is way ahead on his points.

--

Ben is looking forward to celebrating his 10th birthday next month and wants to do some Laser Tag for his celebration, we're doing our best to make that happen. Ethan is hanging in there as well and has been a real prayer warrior with me for Gramma. The other boys pray too when prompted but Ethan takes the initiative to cry out on his own which blesses me greatly and touches my heart.

--

Even through these trying times, good things are happening.

--

**Today's photo is from a family reunion in 2007, Mom is in the center in the green shirt surrounded by three of her five sisters and a cousin.

Whatcha Gonna Blog

Friday Fill-In

1. The lesson I learned yesterday was that people have vastly different advice on how to chill out.
2. Hospitals are a place where friends and family meet.
3. All these years and still I've got more to learn.
4. I like to know what I'm walking into when I arrived.
5. The truth is sometimes you never know.
6. The sky's color is what I remember most from that day.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to chillin' @ home, tomorrow my plans include checking in on the moms and Sunday, I want to go to church and watch 24:Day 8 Premiere!

Gettin' stoopid at the bus stop!

A Time to Blog

For everything there is a season
And every season has its reason
A time to understand; a time to be confused
A time to take command; a time to defuse
A time to run; a time to sit
A time to sew; a time to knit
A time to cook; a time to clean
A time to disappear; a time to be seen
A time to stand strong; a time to fall back
A time of great abundance; a time of great lack
A time to rejoice; a time to repent
A time for the straight and narrow; a time to get bent
A time to do laundry; a time to fold clothes
A time to replace things; a time to make due with old
A time of employment; a time to retire
A time to be celibate; a time to sire
A time for an email; a time for a letter
A time for a phone call; a time for a tether
A time to be with people; a time to be alone
A time to forge ahead; a time to postpone
A time to see clearly; a time for the fog
A time to be productive; and a time to blog.


Just trying to keep my sanity....here's to wastin' time with you!


The annual Elf Hat Christmas Picture (goofy version). Years ago my mom got these hats for the kids; every year I've hid them away and 'surprised' them again with them for a picture. This is probably about the seventh year or so, someday I'll have to go back through all my photo discs and make a collection of them. Oh, the things we do to torture our kids!!

The Power of Blog

Moments after I made my last post public I received a phone call from a friend immediately declaring to me "you are not alone, I just want you to know that." This friend lost her dad not to long ago and is well aware of the emotions that go along with a loved one battling cancer. By the end of our conversation I began to feel I could participate in life again. She didn't try to tell me how to feel, or what to do, just listened and shared some of her experiences. Later in the day while I was running some errands I got another phone call on my cell from my dad. He had just read my post and wanted to check in and let me know that I was a good daughter, a great mom, and that the teenager thing is just what they do and don't take it too personal it will change and they'll realize the errors of their attitude when they have kids of their own. In my heart I know that, I was a terror-able teenager myself in the day. Really my teen is a good kid, it's just the senioritis.

I guess it all just caught up to me the other morning. During the week I was taking care of Mom when she first returned home from the hospital I had a sense of purpose, it kept me busy, we actually had a great time hanging together although I wish it were under better circumstances. Then when I got home it all seemed to catch up with me, all the emotions I had set aside. While it is important to stay in tune with your emotions and not bottle them up to either never deal with or deal with later it is important not to get consumed by them. Perspective has become aligned once again and although there are some unfortunate issues to deal with and choices to make I'm ready come what may. Mother and I have always had a rocky relationship but the underlying love has been there none the less. Many times in states of shredded self-esteem she's accused myself and my brother for not putting her higher up on the list of our life priorities. Well, it's go-time now and she is without a doubt my number one priority. I would like to be here to help as much as she'll have me until she returns to her normal independent self; as of now the doctor says she can not drive for at least 6 months. Yesterday she actually went to an aerobics class at the Neighborhood Club which was awesome! Thankfully in Grosse Pointe you can walk to many things that you'd need daily, the Club is a block away, the grocery store a block away, heck the whole village downtown is within a stone's throw; plus she has lots of friends and neighbors that are clamoring to give her whatever aid she needs. As mom seems to say a lot lately...."All is Well." The important thing is I suppose is to count my blessings, look at what I have and not what I don't have, keep believing for something better, for miracles to fall (which truly they do in little ways everyday), and just be ready for anything. I can do this.

To Bummed to Blog

Not feeling to swell as this new year starts, more like I feel I went 10 rounds and lost miserably, or like I tied one on and can't remember where my car is, my keys are, where I left my purse or who brought me home last night, I feel like I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't, I can't stop randomly crying in the middle of whatever I'm doing, I feel like I don't have anyone nonpartisan I can talk to, then I feel like I'm no good to talk to anyone anyway and burden them with my stupid concerns, I'm just glad the kids are in school during the day so they don't see me this way all the time, by the time they get home I can pull it together to put on a happy face, give them dinner and go over homework, but beyond that I'm pretty much toast. I just want to help my mom get back to 100% but I feel powerless; I just want my husband and I to quit being at odds with each other but yet it continues; I'd just like my teenager to show a little respect but I'll probably never get it; I just need to get over it I guess and go on, but to where?

New Year Meme

New Year Meme
1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?

Put ALL my kids in public school

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions,

and will you make more for next year?

Didn't really make any last year,

just hoping to keep heathly habits growing

and enjoy the little things more.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

My cousin

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Not real close, but we had two women connected to my husband's side

of the family that died in their sleep from accidental overdoses.

Better living through pharmaceuticals is not advised.

5. What countries did you visit?

I really don't get out much, not even of the state,

let alone the country.

But I did get my Passport so I'm ready!

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?

A whole and healthy mom

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory,

and why?

The boys first day at public school and

this whole episode with my mom.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Substitute teaching
9. What was your biggest failure?
Everything happens for a reason, we learn from it and go on

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

No

11. What was the best thing you bought?

not sure
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

I'm really proud of how all the kids are doing in school
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

pleading the 5th since this is a public blog and

I don't want to offend any family or friends
14. Where did most of your money go?

the basic essentials: food, gas, utility bills, oh and taxes (blech)
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Working with my Kids Choir at church
16. What song will always remind you of 2009?

??
17. Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder?

I'll go with happier overall but some bittersweet thrown in

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Hiking, traveling, collaging, singing with an adult choir

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Defending my attempt to stay positive and trust in God
20. How did you spend Christmas?

Gifts with the kids in the morning,

dinner and gifts at the in-laws,

at the hospital with my mom
21. Did you fall in love in 2009?

No.
22. What was your favorite TV program?

24: Watched all the seasons on DVD
23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Trying not to
24. What was the best book you read?

Michael J. Fox's .... Incurable Optimist, his newest one
25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Actually a re-discovery The Christianaires "Thank You"
26. What did you want and get?

Alex to be accepted to Grand Valley State University
27. What did you want and not get?

a healthy mom and out of debt, but we're getting there
28. What was your favorite film of this year?

Nothing really comes to mind

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Pretty much got blown off by my husband and kids

- Old enough to know better
30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Mom not dealing with cancer and

my husband being around more
31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

Comfort is key
32. What kept you sane?

Yoga, Music, hugs from my boys
33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Keifer Sutherland
34. What political issue stirred you the most?

The whole Pallin presentation and Obama's rise

35. Who did you miss?

some of the moms from the Homeschool Co-Op we belonged to

36. Who was the best new person you met?

the principals and teachers I've been dealing with at North Branch

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.

Things can change, and change quickly,

hope for the best but prepare for the worst
38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Whatever it is, Let God fix it

You've got to let my God fix it for you!

Final Notes: Mom is getting better everyday, her short term memory is kicking back in and I'm hoping she will hold off on any more invasive treatments for a time and just work on getting back to her normal, independent, routine. But whatever she does decide I'll be here for her and I'm happy that this sorted situation and brought my brother and I closer together as well.

I'm beliveing 2010 to be a year of

NEW BEGINNINGS!

Written by Robyn

Reality bites.


When I started blogging I made a choice to keep the content generally upbeat. I've shared at times about my mother's dealings with, ok I'll just go ahead and say it this time, cancer. Man, I really hate that word and even more so the disease. This past week things took a turn for the very scary following her radiation treatments on the brain she had a severe mental lapse and was experiencing dementia-like symptoms. In my heart I like to "speak as though it were" and call her healed, but in my head I unfortunately am acutely aware that time is quickly slipping away. It is difficult to know exactly how to handle treatment of this relentless condition, many times it is the treatment that brings about the end to people before the actual cancer would have. While I respect my mom for being so aggressive in her treatment options I don't completely believe the side effects are worth the overall result but I'm doing my best to support her. I'd rather have 6 good strong lucid months, than 6 weeks of utter hell if the choice was mine. (just sayin') After four days in the hospital undergoing an adjustment in her steroid and pain medications she is now home and functioning much better but still unclear about things at times, we're hoping she will at least return to her normal faculties again, at this point it is unsafe for her to be left alone at all, from there I don't know what the next step in her treatment will be. Until now I've tried to stay out of it because I have a differing philosophy from hers as far as my faith in the medical community. I know they do amazing things now-a-days but they aren't perfect. Who is. But now I'm involved, like it or not, she's my mom and I want to help take care of her as best I can, everything else can and will be put on hold for the time being. The bottom line is life during the next year will be .... uncertain.


How will I remember my mom?
as a strong, opinionated woman
an advocate for mentally impaired children
an intelligent and brutally honest person
someone who brought me much joy and pain (as I did her)
a loving, doting grandmother
an independent, yet fragile individual
funny, extremely organized, creative
truly unique


Who knows what the future holds, but at least at this point there is still some future left to make the best of and with God's grace I pray she can finish the race with dignity and solace.

Written by Alex

Me as a Writer

from her Creative Writing class "Memories" project
I want to write.
I need to write –
hopeless lost words of poetry
flowing from my fingertips
like a berry bleeding dark
off crimson juices.

To squeeze and mangle
every last bit of sense from this language
I want – I need –
to put something onto paper.

Fabricated webs where cruel villains play the spiders,
The protagonist the fly, trapped within
a thickly woven net of misplaced meter
feet askew the spider crawls to the prey
and eats our poor, crunchy hero alive

In these times, our times,
breath is short my breath
holds
as if it is afraid to leave my body
just like the words
crawl back into simple cells
of membrane.
Refusing to be birthed into an artificial world.

Poetry thrives in a forlorn world
it eats murder, suicide, and rape for breakfast.
It scrounges the city streets
scrabbling in trash cans and taking the change
from the homeless man’s cup, on the corner.

it is everything we cannot be,
happiness in misery,
faith in the godless,
hope for those who will soon leave us.

And I want to capture it.
I yearn to tame the untamable.
I need to write.

Written by Ethan

Santa’s Day Off
by Ethan Parton

Santa has the day off! And I know what he did! Santa was at the North Pole lying in bed sick of being Santa. Sooooo he took a vacation. And…well, you’re not going to believe this, but he joined a motorcycle gang. He took his sleigh and went to New York and joined the gang. He was actually pretty good. He did a back flip off a ramp and popped a couple of wheelies. “I’m surprised,” the gang master said. “You can join us,” he added as he got on his motorcycle. “See ya later man.” Vrrooommm. The rest of the gang followed him, even Santa. They started jumping over cars and even houses. “Pretty good for a fat man,” the master said. After that insult Santa picked up his bike and threw it at the master. He went to his sleigh and raced back to the North Pole. When he got back Mrs. Claus gave him a big kiss. “It’s good to be back,” Santa said.